Archemides' Principle

Thank you for appreciating my "postings."

Let me now relate a "session" among several body organ's self-importance for the body.

A happy and contented wife was sleeping in bed while the body organs continued to work at a relaxed pace automatically.

The Brain & spinal cord partners started the boast- "We are the most important part of mom's cuerpo. We made her intelligent- making smart descisions, controlled her emotions specially when the husband goes bonkers, make the muscles move so she can do all her work and I am the body's main computer to store all the data and info of her life," said the brain. "And, remember Christopher Reeves ?- he may be superman but was paralyzed form the neck down when he broke it!"

The Lungs almost had an apneic attack and the wife coughed and wheezed briefly. I'm better than you- I make the body breathe and without oxygen you guys will not last 3 minutes! Remember Kathleen Quinlan ? She was in coma but the docs supplied her with oxygen and I kept her alive for 8 years 'til they removed her respirator!"

"That maybe so," said the Heart..."But I pump the oxygen all over yours including all the nutrients so y'all can stay well. You also won't last 3 minutes if I stop my beat ! The Liver interjected..."Well, I'm the refinery that purify these foods and detoxify some of the junk she eats and alcohol she drinks. A liver transplant is hard to get if I become cirrhotic!"

The Kidneys then reminded the other organs what Doc Herm posted recently and continued filtering the urine from the blood while the lady sleeps- the "golden flow" continued.

Then the Ovaries and the Uterus exclaimed together..."Hey, we're important too...and necessary! Of course we need that "ding-dong" guy next to her who at 70 years old is still full of testosterone ! Without us he's just for "show" and mankind is doomed like the dinosaurs but they have already eleven kids and we're tired- mom is only 28 years old so, we can afford to close the "factory!"

After mulling the other organ's contribution they turned their attention to the lowly Colon- "What about you ? You're just full of shit and farts a lot!"

The Colon, quiet as a mouse didn't say anything. It just closed the anal sphincter real tight- like the vaults at Ft. Knox that no amount of purgative will pass thru nor an enema could get get in but continued his business smug as a rug. The next day the wife woke up and sat at the "throne" to do # 2 but was surprised that nothing is coming out.

This continued for 3-days then she started getting sick into the 5th day. The friendly and useful bacterias in the colon started to get pissed-off, their numbers were multiplying by a factor of 4 and the colonic effluent starts to get hard like the rocks of Gilbaltral so, the E.Coli metamorphosed into germs absorbed by the blood thru the mucosa and flowed into the body- first causing peritonitis and appendicitis. When they reached the heart it caused pericarditis and endocardititis to the lungs causing bilateral pneumonia into the liver causing hepatitis; then the brain causing meningitis and brain abcess. All the while the lovely lady reeked like a cesspool when the indole & skatole (gases of waste from the trapped stools emanates thru the skin and dissipated in the air.

Luckily, when rushed to the E.R. a young Pilipino medical resident-surgeon recognized all of this and performed an emergency colectomy(surgical removal of the colon). sutured a colostomy bag thru the abdomen, instituted peritoneal dialysis round-the-clock, put her on a respirator with strong I.V. antibiotics and placed her in a private sterilized and deodorized room with U.V. lights. Alleluyah- she recovered!

Moral: Respect also the "crap!"

I almost forgot about Archie- love those Greeks..."The sum of all parts is equal to the whole."

Get his drift?

Herm