The Woman of My Life

By Zack Chavez

Just before enlisting in the U.S. Coast Guard in the Philippines in 1959, My barkada (my close friends, all guys) and I got together one evening at the neighborhood basketball court drinking San Miguel beer. It was a farewell get together as I was leaving the next day for Sangley Point. We were having a great time singing Elvis songs at the accompaniment of Carlito’s ukulele. Carlito was good. He had taught me the chords to play Elvis’ “Loving You”.

My friends were sad that I was leaving the barkada, and yet they thought it was a great opportunity for me to meet and date American girls, which they could only do in their dreams. Boy Fernandez reminded me to write often and to tell them about my social life in the United States.

My first report to Boy Fernandez was about my experience in Los Angeles on my way to St. Petersburg by Greyhound bus. I was invited by a pen-pal, Barbara, to spend a few days with her family. I was introduced to Barbara by her brother, John, another Coast Guard member whom I had met in San Francisco when I first arrived in the U.S. and was quarantined at the USPHS Hospital where John was undergoing medical tests. Barbara and I exchanged letters while I was in boot camp.

Barbara’s father drove us around town. I remember visiting the Boardwalk in Long Beach and Knotts Berry Farm with her. She had a friendly family and I felt very welcome.

The reaction from my barkada was to advise me not to get serious with any American woman. If I ever married one, according to my friends, the marriage would probably end in divorce. Boy said to come home to pick a Filipino bride. There were several pretty ones already waiting for my return, he said. I knew he was joking.

In late 1960 I bought my first car. It was a 1947 Ford. The color was reminiscent of split pea soup and the finish was dull and flat, as though it had been painted by brush. I paid $50 for it from a used car lot in St. Petersburg. I bought the car even before I got a driver’s license. I had to bring a friend (I believe his name was Zimmerman) from the Air Station to drive the car out of the lot and to the Air Station. I was so excited when I obtained my driver’s permit; now I could drive around town, albeit with restrictions – I had to have someone over 18 with a valid driver’s license with me when I was driving, and I could only drive during the day.

I was anxious to go on a date with a friend. Her name was Judy, a white blonde, whom I had met at a dance at the St. Petersburg Coliseum. Since I wasn’t supposed to drive after sunset, I asked Judy to find another girl so we could double date. I told her about Zimmerman who would be driving my ‘47 Ford, and Judy fixed Zimmerman up with her sister Shirley. We went to a drive-in movie. It was a fun night and we all had a great time.

Judy and I were close friends and that’s as far as it got. She fixed me up with a high school classmate, Louise, on a blind date. Louise had brown hair and blue eyes. I found her very attractive, and it did not take long for me to find out from our conversations that Louise was very intelligent. I later learned from Judy that Louise was the salutatorian of her high school class. When I finally got my driver’s license, Louise and I dated more often. We went to see a movie one evening, then parked at Vinoy Park to watch the full moon. I fetched my ukulele from the back seat and serenaded her, singing “LovingYou” and strumming the ukulele chords that Carlito taught me. Then after the song, I said it. I asked Louise to marry me! She just looked at me with those lovely blue eyes and smiled. I think I surprised her with my sudden proposal. She didn’t know what to say. She wasn’t sure if I was serious. I was serious. I was in love with Louise. It was a quiet ride when I took her home that evening. She didn’t say a single word.

I called Louise the next day to ask her to go to the Coliseum with me for an evening of dancing the coming Saturday. She told me the bad news that she could no longer see me because her parents didn’t want her to get romantically involved with me. I was devastated. She told me I could no longer call her. I started writing without expecting a response; but to my surprise, she wrote back. I was so delighted to be in contact with her again although she made it clear that our relationship would be nothing more than being friends. I had a feeling that Louise kept this new relationship with me a secret from her parents.

After high school, Louise was awarded a 4-year college scholarship at the Florida Presbyterian College, located just outside the gate of the Coast Guard Air Station. Before our relationship broke up we would often meet after her classes and when I was granted liberty. We would go to the Million Dollar Pier for refreshments or just park at Vinoy. Now that she wouldn’t see me anymore, it was so painful to drive by her college because it would always bring back memories of our fun times together.

One afternoon when I was on my way to the chess club, I passed by the college and I noticed Louise’s car in front of me. I followed her for a while until she finally noticed me following her and pulled over. I parked right behind her and came to her car. We talked for a while then we decided we should go to Vinoy Park. She turned on the radio and we heard the Four Aces singing “Love is a Many Splendored Thing”.

From then on, we continued seeing each other without her parent’s knowledge. Louise would go to Judy’s house on weekends and Judy would invite me over so I could spend time with Louise. We saw each other a lot after school and the more we saw each other, our deep love for each other became stronger. We talked about our future. I told her the time would come sooner or later when the Coast Guard would transfer me to a different unit, probably far away and that would be very hard on our relationship. We didn’t want to lose each other. I told her my offer of marriage still stood.

It was in December of 1961 when we decided we would elope. I was 20 and Louise was 19. Judy was the only person who knew about our plan. After some research, we found out we couldn’t get married in Florida without our parents’ consent as we were both underage. We had to go out of state. We found a garage apartment and put a deposit on it. The plan was for her to tell her parents she would be staying with a classmate at the dorm for a week to study for exams and I would be taking leave of absence at the same time. Then we would travel north out of state to the nearest courthouse to get married. I had gotten rid of my ’47 Ford after it was totaled in an accident sometime ago. I had replaced it with a ’56 Mercury and I hoped this car would get us to our destination -- where ever that might be -- to get married, and back.

Louise and I left St. Petersburg on Sunday morning, January 7, 1962. My leave would expire at midnight on Friday. No problem, we thought. We would find the nearest courthouse across the border in Georgia, get married, and be back in St. Petersburg by Tuesday.

We were in a Georgia courthouse on Monday morning. I can’t remember the name of the town. We applied for a marriage license only to find out from the courthouse clerk that Georgia state law didn’t allow inter-racial marriage, so I, a Filipino, and Louise a Caucasian, could not get married in that state. Although we were disappointed, we were not about to give up. We would keep travelling north until we found a justice of the peace who would marry us. Our next stop was South Carolina.

Our first try to get married in South Carolina was also a disappointment. We were told that the state allowed inter-racial marriage but only if the marriage applicants were both American citizens. I had put down my citizenship as Filipino on the marriage license application form, and our application was rejected.

Time was running out. We continued northward to North Carolina but before crossing the border, I told Louise that I had an idea and that we should try another town in South Carolina. On Tuesday, January 9th, we stopped at Walterboro. We found the courthouse and filled out the application for a marriage license. After a thorough examination of our application the clerk said everything was in order but there was a 24-hour waiting period before the judge could marry us. The next day, on January 10th, Louise married a Hawaiian.

Fast forward to January 10, 2012, Louise and I celebrated our 50th in Maui, Hawaii.